“TO LOVE IS TO RECOGNIZE YOURSELF IN ANOTHER.” Eckhart Tolle
This week, we heard a news station make the mindless remark that we shouldn’t care about children and families in distress at the Mexican border because after all, they are not American families. Behind this remark lies a whole belief system – if our family is not directly affected, we should not get involved. Whatever happens outside our perimeters is none of our business. Those people, “the other” are not our concern. This limited belief system is built entirely around the ego, which feeds on being right, always searching outside of itself for hard evidence to support its position. The ego loves rules and regulations, black and white statements, right and wrong positions. These comments make the ego feel safe and secure. They beg to validate a nation’s identity, character and existence.
However, true healers know that this couldn’t be further from the truth. The ego always hides behind unease, anger, tension, stress and deep worry. It yearns to be comforted by simple truths so it can continue its path toward rightness. The deeper truth reveals that by denying the existence of cruelty or pain, we only create more of it. And our how we react to others in distress is exactly how when we are in distress the universe will react toward us. Basically, what comes around, goes around.
Try telling this to a narcissist and watch their eyes roll. Watch them try to defend their position by validating it with any available ammunition they can get their hands on. Watch them call you names, build walls and armor around their egos and stand behind their ideals with dogma and conviction. Yet, in time, all their bricks come crashing down when as Chekov said, “life shows its claws.” Underneath the ego, is the awareness that ignoring the truth and trying to control outcomes with fear-based ideologies only creates more fear. Whatever tragedy may befall you as you move through life and closer toward death, teaches you that in the end love wins over fear. And to love is to recognize yourself in another – all children are our children. Not just those in our own backyard. That is the true language of the soul.